Setelah 4 Tahun Berlalu

Hi blogku yang bersawang,

Setelah 4 tahun berlalu, hari ini saja aku menyinggah sebentar sementara mengenangkan kisah-kisah lama yang sesetengahnya mungkin hampir luput di ingatan sanubari.

Sepertimana nama blog ini, walaupun 4 tahun berlalu aku masih lagi 'The Clueless Wonderer'. Aku hampir lupa mengapa aku namakan blog ini seperti itu, namun sekilas aku teringat mengapa - aku menggabungkan dua perkataan menjadi satu - 'clueless wanderer' (pengembara yang keliru / tiada arah) dan 'wonder amirer' (pengagum keajaiban). Dan ya, ia masih lagi relevan buat diriku.

Setelah 4 tahun berlalu.

29 Jun 2019, Sabtu.

Mampukah aku?

Sarah asyik berkata
semua orang bantu kau
semua orang sayang kau
semua urusan kau senang
Dari awal mula sampailah ke pengakhiran

Aku dan Sarah cemburu dengan kau
sebab kau bisa tersenyum di saat akhir pemergianmu

Aku bertanya pada diri sendiri,
Mampukah aku tersenyum macam kau,
disaat malaikat maut datang menjemput?
disaat malaikat munkar dan nakir datang menyoal?
mampukah aku?

Live On In Our Hearts

Dear Kawan,
How have you been?
Sorry for not being there during your last stay...
I heard you smiled and wore a calm face on that day
my assumption was you'd be alright, right?
Alhamdulillah, InshaAllah, you'll be okay

Dear Kawan,
Your sudden departure was so surprising
But then Kawan,
it was so smooth even friends all over places able to pay their last respect on your last day
Just so you know, you were loved by everyone who have known you

Dear Kawan,
The day fate changed your destiny
Everyone rushed for your aid, concerned and worried
And we all wished for you to come back alive, safe and sound

Dear Kawan,
I rushed to where you've been
I wore anxiety and worried feelings under white uniform
I ran as fast as I could, worrying I might not be able to see you if I was a bit late
But then Kawan,
seeing yourself lying on the white bed made me a little relieved... I made it

Dear Kawan,
I couldn't even cry a river
Not because you're not important to me
But my chest felt calm
As if I know that if this is the best for you
I'd rather letting you go to find your happiness in the after life
Than hoping for you to stay only to live in misery for your lifetime

Dear Kawan,
Tears slowly came down without shame when the thought of not seeing you again came
But then I felt relieved, when I know that you smiled for the last time
Your last time
Your last moment on earth
Before returning to the afterlife

Dear Kawan,
You are our Ketua Gajah
Your small stature cannot be compared with your big heart
Your passion for better life is dear to my heart
Your words of courage, I would never forget that

Dear Kawan,
Even when our hairs getting grey
Even when our memories become hazy
The fact you had lived remains in our hearts
Til we meet again in the Jannah, InshaAllah.

Khairol Azahar Ramli
Sarawakian 25 y.o
March 24 2015

rant on no post this year

Holla! Long time no see arrr my blog~ Oh my.. haven't I post anything this year? nothing? oh dear... my lonely blog~

All right! with all my might, I will post my first entry for the year 2014! Tadaaahh!!!

yeah right.... my being right now is taking a break from industrial training that supposed to end yesterday (13th June 2014), but due to request from my supervisor to extend my period of training for one month, so right now I'm taking a week break to settle all things regarding training reports, JPA claim for thesis and hangout with friends for 2 days, and spend the rest of the week going back home at my parents' place (parent's place already??? not my home?? argh! depressed =.="')

btw... yesterday, the last day of training I have infected my self with food poisoning... why??? why I ate yesterday's yesterday doughnuts! now I'm suffer to the bit that I can't go to sleep without pain in my stomach...

Oyeah~ about work... future work~ With so much confusion on the starting date I should begin to work at the training place (got a job placement there~ v(^-^)b) since this August I have to attend a training for a certificate that's worth RM10,000 or so (of course FOC) under university/faculty for almost 2 or 3 weeks... Should I work and take leave for training? or leave with no salary? or start on September after the training ends? But then the company management decided to let me start after end of training period, which is much to my supervisor's disagreement... haaa.... what should I do.... Oh, I haven't confirm yet the date of training! warghh!! why so late arrr the training organizer to mail me when the training gonna start! I'm so depressed to the max!

argh! leave aside the stress...

now now~~ lets talk about next week~~ my happy week~~

 finally I can go home! for less than a week I see... (+-+) well... everyone should be at home right now~ Nedy came back from her Uni for 3 months break (how lucky!!! 3 months break!!), and I'll be home soon enough to complete the family gathering~ mwahahaha~

yes!!! home, wait for me~

I'll be see you soon enough to make your heart (?) flutter with joy! *nonsense talk... again~!

sore jaa... mada hajimete~

FYP: Need help for BR1M survey

Assalamualaikum everybody!

I need some favors from Malaysians who have applied (qualified or not) and also have received BR1M 1.0 or BR1M 2.0., or maybe for those who have relatives or friends that have applied for BR1M....
will you help me complete the survey I made for my FYP system?
Without this survey I won't be able to test this system, and I have to use dummy data which is not preferable in this situation...
Oh! Those who want to participate even though you didn't apply for BR1M also can participate.

All of your information are secret and confidential, so you don't have to worry about your information being exposed somewhere... All questions are in Bahasa Melayu, if you are interested in this survey, below is the link:
Survey BR1M

I am really grateful if you could help me to complete this survey.
Thank You sooooooooooo Much!